vendredi 9 septembre 2005

Firsts and lasts

Well, I feel like I now have one foot in the door of the work world and one foot in the college world, and it's a strange place to be in. I sometimes get the thought that I'm being half-devoted to each world, that rather than pouring my energy directly into one place it's being split between both. When I'm on a roll with work-related things, I want to forget that I'm still a student and that I have assignments due, and vice versa with school. In a way, I'm facing the lasts of school this year and the firsts of work. It's exciting to know that I'm nearly done but there's so much to do before getting there!

It's funny how God brings us to unexpected things in life. Even a few months ago, I never could have pictured doing what I'm doing right now. I'm constantly amazed at what He has brought me through and how He has orchestrated even the most minute detail to produce something He has intended for me all along. For example, one of my friends was sharing part of her testimony today and she spoke exactly on the lines of what I ended up writing my thesis paper about last month. It was confirmation to me that what I had written was on a necessary topic, and it also showed me that the months I spent in worry about my research topic beforehand was not necessary. I just love the way God's nudging comes through even in the smallest moments :)

Lately, it's been pretty hard expressing my thoughts in words. I usually turn to writing as a form of solace but I've been getting more and more distracted. This may be one of the few times that I've written a longer composition than usual (non-sequential but still lengthy). Regarding the distractions, I'm happy that I finally recognized my need to say no. I've been keeping a list in my agenda of all the things I've declined and it's liberating to pull it out and see what I don't have to worry about. It's so easy for me to forget that when busyness gets in the way of worshipping God, that it has become an idol that has to be abolished. I need to relinquish the satisfaction I derive from being way too swamped for my own good. My heart needs to first rest in Christ.

This is what the LORD says:
"Stand at the crossroads and look;
ask for the ancient paths,
ask where the good way is, and walk in it,
and you will find rest for your souls...."

- Jeremiah 6:16

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